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7/6/13: Correcting Proofs and Revisiting My Process

Spent a few days with my mother visiting from Florida and am back to work today after a break. Yesterday I received the uncorrected proofs to an article of mine coming out in the fall. It’s a response essay to a performance I helped with in 2010 when I taught at BGSU. Everything is being published in a section of Text and Performance Quarterly called The Performance Space. Generally speaking The Performance Space is a recurring section of the journal reserved for discussing performances that have already been staged and then having other scholars respond to those performances in a more formal, sometimes theoretical, manner than a talk-back or conference presentation. I think the idea of The Performance Space is fabulous but am rarely happy with the kinds of discussions that take place there. Regardless, I’m writing one of the two response essays to the script which will also be published in the same section along with a framing essay from the performers. I’m really happy with the piece as a whole and with my essay specifically.

I fell out of love with writing and researching, with theorizing, during the three years I spent at BGSU. Almost all the people I worked with were terrible human beings and were almost extensively awful to me. I was hired into a tense departmental environment and because I was hired by an embattled department head (who is a really great dude) half the department put me “in his camp” and treated me like an enemy before they even knew who I was. Not only did they work actively to demean me as a person, they ripped apart my teaching, my research, my beliefs (in myself and my work), and my philosophies. I was a newly minted PhD and instead of mentoring me or supporting me in any way, these fools tore me down at every turn. As a result, I stopped writing. I lost confidence. I believed their hype. The performance I’m responding to in the forthcoming article happened during my last semester of those three intense years. The performance was great. I was incredibly proud of the performers and the work they did. I’m also really proud of the article I’ve written precisely because I’ve produced something out of those turbulent times, where I doubted everything.

The essay is about compositional and critical strategies of feminine writing in adaptation, interpretation, and performance practice. You can read the uncorrected proofs here. I’m working on the query sheet here. Let me know what you think, I’d love to talk with folks about the work.

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